Make you feel that way

Make you feel that way...

Up and early for the hope of a brand new day
See a homie you ain't seen since back in the day
Fresh haircut fitted wit a fat ass fade
End of work, we chilling on a Saturday
How you felt when you first heard the data came
Rakim KRS hey I had that tape
Cooling out with ol girl on a fat ass date
Find a hundred dollar bill wow man that's great
Get promoted at your job up to management
Plot a long time finally a plan has made it
Time I feel I wanna shout, man its real that way
Wanna think of things that make you feel that way

.....

Christmas day when your mamma got your first bike
Type of feeling when you went and when your first fight
How your team felt winning championship games
Celebrate in a huddle dancing in this rain
Have a thought see a shooting star cross your screen
Put in hard work finally your living your dream
Deaf man get his hearing now in come vibes
Blind man get sight see his first sunrise
Dumb man speaking out, now he's load and clear
Earth through your chout smile so proud ya wear
Going in your third eye for the styles ya hear
Making music that'll bump for a thousand years
Eating right feeling conscience like health is first
Said a prayer that's sincere and you felt it work
Times I feel I wanna shout, man it's real that way
When I'm thinking things that make you feel that way

.....

All up in her vibe something coming over me
Summer days more likely that you notice breezes
Winter days more likely that you notice heat
When I'm warm more likely that you notice me
In the dark it's more likely that you notice light
In the light more likely that you notice night
Hungry more appreciation for that meal
Dead broke more appreciation for that grill
A bad day'll make you really notice ones that's good
And that'll make things a little better understood
Times I feel I wanna shout, man it's real that way
When I think of things that make you feel that way
Make you feel that way...

---------
(Ya know its like ahh like the most greatest feeling you could ever feel
you like just total illation. Sunny day, just that day.
You know its just like you know just the most joyous feeling
you could ever comprehend. You know, chilling with your family.
You know just you know just really really feeling,
feeling the moment, with the folks. Ya know really really really just chilling.
It's love. It's love. It's love)

Song makes me happy. Lyrics are a go.

I had a bad day. I was exhausted. I still have a bad cold and have been coughing till my eyes tear up. From dawn till dusk I'd been working on school related things: waking up at 6 am, driving to Davis, realizing I never did my homework due at 10, stressing, giving up, bullshitting, realizing I would be busy all afternoon and night, and on top of that, had a group meeting at 9 p.m. of all hours, and still more to do after that.

All because I didn't do shit over the weekend except play.

At the same time I thought of how wonderful the weekend was, how much fun I had with my friends, laughing and joking and fucking the weekday, because fuck the weekday.

And I was thinking this morning as I was driving in the Monday Bay Area fog gloom, falling in and out of traffic, how much I hated the start of Monday; that's when the flood of thoughts come in and all the things to do and how much I suck and how much school sucks - back on the Monday grind when I fucking hate the Monday grind.

Fuck the grind, fuck Mondays, fuck routine. So sick of the same shit day in and day out. So fucking pointless.

Such are the relentless negative Monday morning thoughts of May Yang. Not like this every Monday, but on particular Mondays of stuffy nosedness, headachiness, cloudy, rainy, stress-provoking, almost Finals, Monday, Monday, Monday. Didn't U2 mean to write "Monday, Bloody Monday" instead of whatever crap they wrote? Sundays still have promise. Monday is only good because it leads to Friday.

All in all, I felt like this all day:

Cloudy headed, disconnected, & fucked-up looking.

It wasn't until the end of the night did I remind myself of the Universal Rule of Chill. Just gotta chill sometimes.

I'll be cool man. Just gotta take it slow, breathe a little, laugh a lot, smoke up when I need to. I got all the right tools - friends, family, etc. - just gotta u-til-lize my resources, yanno? & shit.

Pop dat Dayquil/Nyquil, (didn't know combining Sudafed and Dayquil could potentially cause death), drink cough syrup like you're Lil' Wayne, smoke a blunt, whatever.

Coo'. Chill.

Everything's coo'.

A trip down memory lane

Some of my best memories have been made while high.

I could have pages and pages full of fun/funny/questionable high memories, had I made the effort to write these things down.

Sudden flashback(s) of before I "came out" with my pot smoking:

The ritual of going to a certain friend's house late at night. Sitting on her bed, waiting for her to pack that bowl in her hardy ass bubbler. Sneaking out quietly and hiding in the shadows outside. Inhale. Hold it in. Let it out. Oh shit. Cough. Giggle. Oh shit car's coming. Oh shit was that your dad. Again and again.

Going back inside her room and chillin'. A lot of times we would whisper for no fucking reason. Then we'd be like, aye! why da fuck we whisperin?! Watching television. Sitting in silence for long periods of time. "Dude we've been sitting here for like 20 minutes not sayin' anything!!" "Nah dude, you trippin, it's only been 2 minutes." "WHAT THE FUCK1". Explosion of laughter. "See, now we're not whisperin'." "Yeah, why the fuck were we whispering." I swear this conversation seemed to happen every night.

Deep thoughts thinking. A floating body. Being in another wooooooorld.

Well. That was a whole 'nother stage of my personal "high evolution". Highvolution. That was when I first started getting high on the regular, but not on the daily. Just weekends and breaks from school. My tolerance was much lower and each experience was very special.

It all seemed so damn special to me.

Like, oooh, it's late. Everyone's going home. Time to smoke. That special time to tune out.

No complaints. Not sayin' my high experiences aren't awesome or meaningful now. They totes are. Not sayin' I don't get high to tune out from the big bad world anymore. But the aforesaid story is a very special part of my High Life. The whole ritual. Of getting high with your good friend before all your good friends were toking (well, to be fair, they ALL were already, just not as much as now).

Also the secrecy...

made it fun.

The exclusiveness.

Don't get me wrong though. I still got mad passion for pot. That was just another chapter of mah life.

I be movin' on now and shit. I speak different too! Motherfucker!

note: Contrary to what you may think, I am not high right now. I am merely contemplative.

It's 3 am and I'm ruminating over the shet-load of things I must do this week. They include:

• A midterm
• A "midterm interview" - basically an oral midterm for Chinese class
• Advising appointment
• A quiz on Freud's "The Uncanny"
• 2 quizzes for Chinese class
• A Shakespeare essay (4-5 pages)
• Schedule my first interview for my editorial internship (gulp)

I'm up right now after spending the latter part of the night studying for the midterm - still a long way to go, but have to stop and continue after my Chinese class tomorrow. Am now trying to finish my Chinese homework that is due in the morning. And thinking on what day shall I start x in order to turn in x on such and such day? (Example: Must read Shakespeare on Tuesday and have outline done by Wednesday? Read "The Uncanny" on Tuesday before class, but then when do I finish the chapter on Psychoanalysis? Etc, etc.)

I'm stressed out - need to time-manage more efficiently.

My memory is becoming more and more impaired. I forgot where I read - a Yahoo article I think - that the type of person who, on the daily, is forgetting where he/she is putting his/her keys a minute after putting them down...is not just a "forgetful" type, but simply overscheduled. Biologically (neurologically?) inept to handle this much.

A brain can only handle so much. A no-brainer, really.

Also doesn't help that my body serves as a chimney for all that pot smoking. Knowing that I would be regretfully busy this week, I left my newly purchased quad (of C-4, a potent hybrid) at home. Less smoking this week, lady. (I do have an edible on me -- it's waiting.)

If you'd like to take a peek at my smoking habits the past month, please check out my daytum account. These statistics are from a lot of guessing. I think it's fun!

I'm clearly a stoner. I don't know why I'm sober right now. Oh right, that homework...back to that.

Let's get some shoez.

(via urbanoutfitters.com)

I'm at Starbucks with an iced skinny vanilla latte (delicious, overpriced, and with a stupid name), studying... and dreaming of shoes.

Nikon D3000

Late in posting as usual. I should start out by saying that my 21st birthday was fabulous. Honestly it would be too much of a daunting task to say everything that happened - maybe some other time. Let us just remember that it was fabulous, ethereal, divine...

I also tried salvia this past weekend. This too is a daunting task to explain. I do not think such an experience is possible to express in words - so I won't, for now. Later.

I'm most likely heading back to the motherland (China) this September, and I aim to capture my journey with a new DSLR camera. I swear that is my main purpose of purchasing something so expensive. I'm not trying to be a hipster...

Have been doing extensive (not really) research on entry-level DSLR cameras, and am probably settling on the Nikon D3000, which will cost around $450-500. I think this is a great price for what I am going to get, but will not be purchasing it until I feel a bit more financially secure. So this summer, maybe, and I will get a chance to ask my camera savvy friends what they think. I would love to take a photography class also, if I can squeeze it in. :)

Play something for me, Alicia

I've been haplessly busting my ass off as usual. Once again, I've been needlessly scheduling myself in ways that divert from common sense. Not sure why I thought I would be able to drive to and from Oakland, making it back to Millbrae past midnight, then drive back to Davis during witching hours, sleep for 2 hours, and wake up to volunteer for the UCD Triathlon. As you can understand by now, this didn't happen. While I can't say I'm happy with myself, I must say the weekend was well worth it anyway...


Well, why was I in Oakland? For the Alicia Keys Freedom Tour! It was absolutely incredible. She is quite the artist, quite the woman. We didn't really get to see Melanie Fiona, but hey, that was fine, as long as we got to see the very sexy Robin Thicke! Wow, what a powerful guy. He had a whole arena of women swooning! When the backdrop was revealed and it said Robin Thicke - Sex Therapy in sexy black and red, the ladies were sold! Oracle Arena instantly turned into a giant coliseum of rabid, lusty women, hands grabbing and arms stretched out, reaching for the sexy flesh that is Robin Thicke, so ready were they to tear the-- oh shit that was just me. Rambling.

Well, Mr. Robin Thicke was a great warm-up for my impaired lungs. Yes, I put her through a lot - hard hours at the gym had got them panting, and she gasped for air after each cigarette and harsh bong rip. But at this concert, my lungs had to deal with all the hyperventilating and adolescent schoolgirl screaming that was provoked by Robin Thicke's rotating hips, gyrating and thrusting and-- oh shit- ... Rambling again.

Basically my throat hurt from all the excitement (although my friend Rachael still beat me in that department). Of course you have to scream at each song change, and each time the artist speaks. Every word. Yes. Scream.

She sang all of her hit songs spanning her four (amazing) albums, plus some lesser knowns, like "Superwoman". Trust, you think her song sounds good on CD and with yo good speakers and shit, but you ain't HEARD her sing live! Girl can sing like no other! One of my faves from the concert was a lively upbeat version of "No One" and a godly "Wait till U See My Smile".

Somewhere along the line some scrappy bitches in the back were clawing at each other and fighting and shit. Not cool, girl!

I was totally jealous of all her outfits, nothing flashy, no costumes, but pure sophisticated Alicia: black blazers, leather leggings, a white dress made for a goddess. Ugh. So jealous.

She finished off with "Empire State of Mind", where she had to replace the "New Yorrkkkkk" with 'Oakland' a couple times.

Great concert. Great everything: great backup singers, background dancers, audio/visuals. I must say I was quite annoyed with the narrowness of the seats, but all was made up for with the amazing acoustics of the arena, and hearing Alicia's celestial voice...and Robin... oh shit!




I should say, though, that I have absolutely no clue as to how we ladies arrived at the concert. It is a fact that I drove, but it shan't have been my car - of all things - that I drove. No, no, it can't have been! It was a space shuttle that I drove, yes. I think I was supposed to have driven my white Toyota Prius there, but after that ridiculously fat joint that a certain friend of mine constructed was smoked between us, my car turned into a spaceship! That is the only explanation possible.

Yes, I was impossibly blazed a good portion of the concert.



[in soft voice]And the space shuttle...took off...

Oh boy, am I high right now. I see that shuttle now, flying off into the universe.

See ya later, Buzz.

April showers bring May flowers

It's April!

Sure, I am seven days late but I am always late.

April brings a lot of new and exciting things for me (Move aside, Easter, Jesus Christ, and zealous Christians).

For example, there is UC Davis Picnic Day (big drunkfest), 420, my 21st birthday (get ready, son!), and a series of smaller events, such as the UCD Triathlon (sadly, I am not participating as I had hoped - but I am volunteering!). I am also going to two shows this month: Passion Pit on campus (on my birthday!), and Alicia Keys in Oakland.

But as usual, backwards minded racist conservative hicks be tryna ruin this month fo' me -- what the fuck, yo!

National dickface Bob McDonnell, governor of Virginia (what's the weed like in Virginia?), has declared April to be Confederate History Month. Once again I am humbly reminded of how lucky I am to be from the WEST COAST, the BAY AREA at that, raised with CULTURE and an open mind. No sir, I do not consider your redneck-and-proud lifestyle to be anything remotely related to culture (certainly not "high culture", I should say). Nor do I find any sense in promoting the INHERENT RACISM that is associated with the Confederacy. Slavery, hello?...SMH at Southerners--

Click the image for some innocent lols.

And the worst part is knowing that there's a whole clusterfuck of ding-dongs that are throwing their cowboy hats in the air and drinking in celebration, "Hey, y'all! Let's organize our next boot party, y'all! In the name of God, y'all!"

Are you there, God? It's me, May. Smite these mothafucka's to hell!

And here I am researching and reading reviews of good cheap wines that I can buy when I turn 21.

*Sigh* Always gotta kill my good time.